A Sweet Freedom

Someone I know is starting a quarterly online magazine with a free subscription. Since I'd like to get published someday, I figured it wouldn't hurt to curry a little favor where I can:

A new fiction magazine will debut January 1, 2008.

Noctem Aeternus will be a FREE quarterly PDF magazine where the
reader will find science fiction, fantasy, western, or even mystery
stories…but all tales will have an element of horror.

"The horror genre sometimes gets a bad reputation for being the
shock jocks of the literary field," Editor Michael Knost said. "You
can find plenty of blood and guts, but sometimes there is no story
among the gore. Noctem Aeternus will be a quality fiction magazine,
focusing on the story and its characters."

The first issue will include a short story (and interview) from
master storyteller Ramsey Campbell. Ramsey Campbell is perhaps the
world's most honored author of horror fiction. He has won four World
Fantasy Awards, ten British Fantasy Awards, three Bram Stoker
Awards, and the Horror Writer's Association's Lifetime Achievement
Award.

Sign up for the FREE subscription or read the submission guidelines,
at:

www.michaelknost.com

Please spread the word!

One day I'll be a movie star

There's nothing sweeter than a wicked pimp fight.



Them mugs keeps it rael!

A Long Absence

It's been almost a year since my last post. While this may seem, in theory, to be a long time there are many other factors to consider. For example, did you stop to think how long it's been since you found a way to reference genitalia in a humorous way? How about how long it's been since you found out that hooker you hooked up with at three o'clock in the morning after a wicked night of drinking was actually a man? Ponder if you will the last time you scrawled obscenities on someone's face who was passed out at a party, then sent them for more beer? Or instead of wasting time reading this you could be watching two of the baddest pimps in all the land battle for supremecy on the mean streets of your hometown.

Behold the Genius Pimp Avenger

Tour Guide - Vulcan Trail

Vulcan Trail is the best walking venue in Birmingham. Located under Vulcan Park, home of Birmingham’s cast iron God of forge and fire, it features some of the best free views of the city. All of downtown and much of the surrounding area is visible from vantages stretching the length trail. The path is paved and marked at each quarter mile, running a full mile in one direction. The trail can become crowded at times, especially in the early evening and on weekends when the weather is comfortable, but this can be avoided by going later in the evening or during midmorning hours before lunch. This is a dog-friendly trail, with plenty to keep the pooch occupied on the walk. Most bring leashes for their dogs but let their dogs wander if there aren’t many people around; only a few leave their leashes and manners at home. With the smell of Dreamland barbeque in the air and the occasional party at the Club or Vulcan Park’s reception center serenading the walker with soft music and loud laughter, you never entirely leave the city behind and the added ambiance in the midst of the natural surroundings only increases the uniqueness of this trail. Parking is located off Richard Arrington Jr. Boulevard about a mile south of Five Points in the shadow of Vulcan.

The Joys of Youth

I strolled around my house today, enjoying the searing 100+ degree heat that sent reams of sweat pouring down my back and face, waiting for my dog to go to the bathroom. This is a touchy subject as my dog at times can get irritable bowel syndrome, also known as the uncontrollable shits, and therefore needs to be pushed and prodded into potty breaks on a regular interval. As I yelled encouragement to her ("Sadie! Go potty! Right now! HURRY UP!") a late model sedan pulls into the alley next to my house with its bass thumping. A man jumps from the passenger seat and looks in my direction. Being accosted in my backyard is nothing new; sometimes it's nice to know I can step out the back door and be offered crack at reasonable prices without any need for troublesome transportation. However, this gentleman had no desire to sell me any recreational pharmaceuticals. With barely a glance, he walks around the car, pulls down his pants, and begins to urinate on my neighbor's fence. I had to admire the kid for his gutsy move. I've performed all manner of public drunken urination in my day but never directly and blatantly in front of a complete stranger like he was doing. Now came the quandry: as a responsible member of the community and homeowner, I should yell at the kid and threaten to call the police. It was the right thing to do. However, being able to identify with the intense need to relieve one's self wherever one can I stayed my hand for a moment as I thought this through. Finally, with the mosquitoes buzzing around my face and the sweat continuing to pour down my body, I called my dog to me and we went inside.

I mean, he wasn't peeing in my yard, right?